Polyamory: MMF Triad

Up to 1,400 newspapers

When poly triads and quads first began seeing their inquiries taken seriously by newspaper advice columnists, it was truly a big deal. Here we were being recognized in public as actually existing; millions of people were reading, with their eggs and toast, that poly relationships are actually possible and happening in the real world.

Now that this kind of attention is becoming almost commonplace, it hardly seems like news. But yes it is, and yes it really matters.

This week, huge numbers of newspapers are about to print the following from Dear Abby, supposedly the most widely syndicated newspaper columnist in the world:

Woman with husband and lover wants one big happy family

By Abigail Van Buren

Dear Abby: Sometime ago, you printed a letter from one of your readers who was upset over her son’s polyamorous relationship. I didn’t respond then, but now that my triad is ready to come out to my boyfriend’s family (we are out to mine and to my husband’s family), I feel the need to address this lifestyle in your column and ask your advice.

My husband and I have been together 10 years. We started out as swingers. When we met my now-boyfriend, it became apparent that it was going to be more serious than “play” partners. Our particular arrangement is a “V” triad, meaning I am involved with two (husband and boyfriend), but they are not involved with each other.

My boyfriend is extremely important to us in every way. We all work together to make a very smooth-running, loving household.

I want you and your readers to know that this IS a viable relationship with love, respect and, most important, open communication. This kind of relationship — or any, for that matter — is doomed without it.

An estimated half-million people in the United States are part of polyamorous relationships. We’re not freaks in need of counseling, but people who realize that love can grow and that there is an alternative to monogamy.

Abby, I would like to get some tips from someone who doesn’t readily accept this life or even know it’s out there. My boyfriend’s family is conservative and they know he lives with a married couple. We’ve all spent time together, and I think they like me. Of course, they don’t know I’m romantically involved with their son.

What’s the best way to tell them about our triad? We want them to know this isn’t the end of the world and that I love him very much. I’d appreciate any advice from you or your readers on this. Until we’re out of the closet, please sign me...

Nowhere And Everywhere

Dear N And E: Because you’re looking for input from someone who “doesn’t readily accept this life,” you have come to the right place. You didn’t say how long your boyfriend has been living with you and your husband, but if it has been any length of time and his parents know he isn’t involved with anyone else, it’s possible they already have some suspicions.

Because they are conservative, if I were you I wouldn’t shatter their illusions. I can almost guarantee they won’t embrace you for it. If you feel you MUST disclose the information, then do it in the same way that you have explained it to me. But don’t expect them to jump for joy.

Here's a typical newspaper appearance (Aug. 16, 2011). Join the comments; they've just begun. And here's her official site.

Why is this a big deal?

Because according to her syndication service, Dear Abby is the most widely syndicated newspaper columnist in the world.... Abby commands a client list of about 1,400 newspapers worldwide, and a daily readership of more than 110 million people.

Abby receives more than 10,000 letters and e-mails per week... has appeared as an expert on all major networks, including ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX and NBC... uses her column not only to entertain, but also to educate. In the U.S., public and private middle schools use her column to teach sex education and generate classroom discussion on a variety of subjects; the same is true in colleges and universities.... Dear Abby is used by educators worldwide as a teaching tool in adult level ESL (English as a Second Language)....

Every Web site mentioned in Dear Abby receives an immediate onslaught of viewers, and organizations mentioned are routinely encouraged to gear up to accept millions of hits....

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Reply by World Polyamory Association

Polyamory's huge, getting bigger every day. There have always been polyamorous relationships.  Polyamory is in the most ancient writings, from Sumer to the Bible to current times, people have always loved who they love.  In more recent times moral values changed and a part of our society has found it necessary to go underground. But anyone who looks at what's actually going on, studies DNA and the internet will soon come to the conclusion that many are not monogamous. Few marry only one person for life. Even fewer have only one sex partner their entire life.

Time for a reality check. Time to honor what is and stop making people feel bad for doing what comes naturally. It's natural for nature to diversity its gene pool. Genetic studies show there are few if any animal species that are monogamous.

There are ways to love that honors all involved, that move past lying, cheating. Infidelity hurts.  Honesty shows respect for all involved, all the way around.

Support relationship choice, whatever your personal choice may be.  We tend to shift throughout life based on necessity and circumstances. Allow a natural flow, for yourself, your friends, family, co-workers, community members.  Love is the answer. Love is the high road to living a conscious life.

Please contact us at www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com, email: worldpolyamory@aol.com, 808-244-4103.  I recommend you attend a conference, network, go to local poly support groups.  Honor yourself.

Our next polyamory conference is July 13-15, 2012 at Harbin Hot Springs, N. CA.  See you there!

Become a sacred lover. Learn All-Chakra Tantra and master the art of conscious, sacred sexuality. Give and receive whole body healing with other Students on the tantric path. Clear your chakras (energy centers) and become a manifestation of divine love.

As divinity incarnate, you’re attractive, sexy, sensual, irresistible. All are drawn to you because you’re channeling energy directly from Source/Universal Consciousness. You vibrate at a higher frequency. You become enlightened (full of light) and radiate love. Others are drawn to you, compulsively, like a moth to a flame.

You are a clear vessel of Love/God/Goddess. You are the sacred healer, the lover, a Daka or Dakini. You’re a true tantrica who emanates love, respects life, heals others through your sacred touch, love and spiritual beingness that’s forever connected to Love/Light/Source. Now you know it, feel it in ever cell of your being.

Students serve as surrogates (stand-ins) to help each other find the perfect mates (beloveds) and develop the skills to keep them and maintain functional, healthy, happy, successful relationships. You assist each other as you clear negativity. You learn skills that allow you to communicate clearly and consciously, authentically. You embody personal responsibility, truth, integrity, honesty, all things that make you attractive and desirable.

You have the cleared, healed, conscious relationships that you’ve always wanted. You experience love, laughter, abundance, joy and bliss.

You are sexually and sensually satisfied. Your life works (finally). You are free.

All this and more await you when you learn tantra, internalize it and master these sacred, spiritual teachings in to your being. You become the divine beloved at the Temple of Tantra, Maui, Hawaii.

Create conscious partnerships. Heal, clear those yucky things you don’t like in your current relationship. Bring in your lover. Tell him or her that you want to make it right, feel good, happy and blissful for both of you. If it’s not working for one, it’s really not working for both of you. You miss her or him. Where’s the excitement you once had? You were so great together, so juicy when you first met. Then what happened? You can fix it. You can recover your bliss. There are ways where there’s a will. And if not, because you’re really not meant to be with each other, not a match, then you can set each other free with kindness and love.

Joy, bliss, unconditional love, orgiastic energy is your birthright. You were conceived because someone (maybe two someones) had an orgasm. Life is supposed to be orgasmic. 47-52% of women do not have orgasms. Shame on all of us. We need to correct that for orgasms are our connections to God Source.

Clear your channels and open up your hailing frequencies to God/Source. Hello?

Now the real fun begins. Life is orgasmic, one HUGE orgasm as your kundalini awakens and you crack the cosmic code. Sexual energy and spiritual energy, love and God.dess are all the same thing! ONE! You are a spiritual being of love and light from God/Sourc manifesting as a human being. You are a BEING being human. Got it? Viola! Now you are enlightened (full of light). Life! Life it light! Enjoy it!

Join us, learn with us, grow evolve:

School of Tantra: www.schooloftantra.com

Temple of Tantra: www.templeoftantra.com

Sacred Matrix: www.sacredmatrix.com

Social Network: www.sacredmatrix.ning.com

Meetup: www.meetup.com/sacred-matrix

Ancient Anthropology/UFOs: www.enkispeaks.com

Extraterrestrials: www.extraterrestrialcontact.com

We are beings eternally evolving, learning, growing, through lifetimes, here on the Earth and other planets, realms, dimensions. Sometimes we’re light beings while other times we alter, lower or raise our vibrational frequencies to merge with bodies or energies in various levels of physical and spiritual manifestation. Eventually we evolve to the point where we’re able to create life from existing matter and energy. As we progress we learn how to terra form planets. There are those who actually learn how to manifest planets for terra forming by others who are learning to shape the planet’s terrain and introduce life forms, which they also create. We who are inhabiting this lowest dimension of physicality have a tendency to play victim and blame others for our situation, but actually we are creating this reality. Every thing, all is subjective. It’s not only the law of attraction in action, but we actually create even while we exist in this densest of dense forms. We are more conscious of our creative abilities when in the spiritual realm (dead). But we are just as capable of creating in this world. It’s just on a more unconscious level. That’s why it’s so important to manage our emotions, thoughts and deeds, for thoughts are deeds and it is by and through our lives and the execution of these deeds that we are judged by ourselves when we die.

We are God Source, eternal beings continually practicing on a soul level creating and manipulating energy and matter. We do the same thing here, on Earth, using our hands in combination with our minds and will. We become adept at manipulating and controlling those around us through posturing, posing, word-smithing, smiles, anger, coaxing, conditioning, training, sexuality and energy. Using all we continually shift and change things with our minds, adjusting them to our will, rearranging them to suit our needs, wants and desires. We do the same things on our soul level by pure will, for we are not incarnated in a mind (brain) and are more expanded, able to manifest by pure energy and desire.

Here on Earth we are assisted by our bodies through our brain (mind). We move mountains. We create massive civilizations which we frequently destroy with the flick of a button, bombs, armies, war, biochemical warfare, mind control, designer diseases, drugs and their side effects. Our food, water, soil and air are laced with chemicals designed to shorten our lives and release toxins, bacteria, diseases and germs in to our bloodstream and bodies. Order, chaos, order, chaos cycles endlessly through the years, throughout our lives providing scenarios for our evolution.

What can we do to combat parasitic vampires atop the pyramid with their all seeing eyes who consume everything through greed, money, power, sucking us dry till we’re all physically, emotionally, morally and spiritually dead?

Our only revenge is to become conscious, awake and aware within the dream. "Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream." True. It is. And we are the dreamer who becomes the chooser by transforming the unconscious to lucid dreams to total awareness, a reality where we are the captain at the helm of the ship.

What we perceive we believe we conceive we achieve. If we no longer buy in to their (the Illuminati, creators of the perverted matrix) game, they won’t have enough players to play their play, operate their version of reality. They know this.

We are given free will by Source (God). We need venues for physical lives in sentient form for the evolution of our souls. Societies that are too repressive don’t allow us to co-create with Source and are no longer viable for Creation to sustain or substantiate their existence.

We are Source incarnated in souls (spirit) and flesh (bodies). We are the perfect hybrid, living in symbiotic harmony (for the most part). Souls who cannot adjust to their bodies do not resonate in harmony and subsequently create chaos and harm to themselves and others.

Earth is the playground for billions of souls (perhaps trillions since the dawn of time) who come here because it’s attractive, like a favorite tourist destination. Conditions are prime for souls to learn, grow, expand, evolve.

A world that’s too polluted becomes no longer viable for sentient life. Enough freedom must be given to permit souls to grow and evolve which souls do by being co-creators with Source. Devolution is death for all life, so the population decreases and souls go elsewhere to gain experiences for their personal evolution.

Earth is prime, a mix between "good" and "evil", so there’s enough catalyst and challenge for growth. However, the system is becoming too perverse, is in danger of total destruction, too limiting, too restrictive to continue. So either Earth’s human system experiences a perturbation to uplevel it’s perverted system to a higher playing field or it will self destruct sending the energy and beings the system held capture back in to the cosmos.

Back in the cosmos, energy and matter will coalesce and re-constellate to more viable forms and configurations that better serve God Source, Creation and all it’s beings, life and energy forces. God/Creation/Creativity rules so diversity continues to diversify. Otherwise, souls stop coming here. No more tourists. It’s too ugly.

I believe Earth is too valuable because of her level of diversity which was created because of her polarity paradigm plus her location in the densest part of physicality, to be permitted to perish. While souls may be able to go to other venues for experiences and evolution, Earth’s playing field is so unique, it's too prescious. We're being watched. I believe we are ripe for intervention from higher evolved beings, many of which are related to us or are part of our soul groups who experience extraterrestrial lives in between human lives. They are invested, attached and care about us for we are them and they are us.

We’re seeing more and more sightings. Every day witnesses come forth from all over the world ranging from above top secret black projects leaders to average Joe, Jose or Jin citizen in all walks of life. Putting all together, connecting the dots, we have the true history of the Earth and a potential for a future far brighter and expansive than what could actually be achieved through natural evolution and at a much faster rate. Intervention is actually perfection. It's time we wake up, accelerate and become a civilized civilization.

Literally, tomorrow, we could be invited to join the Federation of Planets. Yes, it’s perhaps a Star-Trekkian vision that to many seems unrealistic. Yet unless we reach outside the box to the Sacred Matrix, a divine peace paradigm of love, we’re guaranteed to perish if we continue unchecked at this rate. The indicators are here. Proof lies in every direction. Just open your awareness, trust and believe that we are worthy on all levels, physical and soul, for life and existence through all time. Access your inner goodness (Godness) and light. Love one another at all times, always in all ways for we are all one anyway. Wake up. Now you remember.

But I’m blessed beyond belief for I am loved and have been loved by some incredible people, male and female, some living, some dead. Each year that passes more cross over. They are all, always with me. I’m so fortunate that I have a husband, my best friend, lover, confidant. We share everything–hopes, dreams, desires, heartaches, fortunes and failures. We married each other the first time we made love. We married a second time at the Celebration of Eros Conference at Harbin Hot Springs, Northern California in 1997 in front of 200 tantrikas. We married each other legally at the Cupids Chapel in Las Vegas September 20, 2000. We marry each other again every New Years Eve on our deck overlooking the Kahului Harbor in Maui while hundreds of fireworks light the night sky.

We are love incarnate, soul mates, twin flames, eternally entwined, connected, one, love divine. We find each other lifetime after lifetime. We are part of a larger soul group that’s closely connected to an even larger soul group. We all love each other unconditionally, know that we are one love, one being with many arms reaching to the farthest part of the cosmos. We frequently reincarnate together in various configurations, changing sex and relationships to more effectively expedite lessons and accelerate our soul’s evolution. While my ego self may long for connection, my soul knows I’m always one with all of you. My capacity to love includes all of you and all beings, all life everywhere, here, there and in the cosmos.

Who will come hold my hand, look in my eyes, stroke my hair, kiss my cheek? That's the mystery. Uknown. But simultaneously I am so blessed to have dear Sasha forever at my side. My awareness now comprehends that if ever we should cross the veil without the other, we remain eternally connected. I suspect, however, that we’ll go together. And the love we’ve shared with those we’ve been blessed to know has been so incredibly awesome, a true gift. Even though our ego selves may have reacted to one another in some extreme, sometimes bizarre ways, underneath it all, we remember our oversoul's purpose. We are wise.

2010 was a struggle, a choice for both of us to stay here, alive, in this dimension, on blessed Gaia. We chose to remain, to share more time, learn more, gather experiences, grow, expand, evolve our souls. We journey out again to the mainland soon, to meet some of you, share breath, life and a piece of our souls. I'm excited, apprehensive, joyous, aware. Maybe some of you will recognize us, see the beautiful children and the young man and woman that lies beneath our souls. Maybe you'll dare to care. I love so much and remain open, polyamorous all my lives.

I know there are those capable of expanding love beyond magazine covers, runway models, Hollywood images and superficial symbols. I am confident there are those who embrace true intimacy, love and authentic relationships. Love is far more than the temporary bodies we wear. Sash and I laugh and say we are like the charpei dogs next door, each passing year makes our skin sag and droop! But how our souls glow beneath that laughter with our ability to love so deeply, so completely. True, we were both once young and beautiful and yes, that look is long gone. But now we shine with a different beauty, one of age and wisdom. And those we love often come the say way! And amazingly others of all ages see beyond and recognize beauty in whatever ever form it comes and desire to join with us in sacred union.

Together we share our souls, body, love deeply, transcend our separate, skin-encapsulated self sense and soar as one to touch the face of God Source as she smiles, laughs and embraces her children who are all parts of Her God/dess Self. We look forward to meeting our soul mates – all of you. And who knows which ones will feel inclined to join us in holy communion in our tantric temple community ashram in Mother Maui, Hawaii? We remain open, forever, totally devoted to love. We’re committed to the path, certain of it’s perfection wherever it goes. We have no attachment, content with the now. Happy as it is and open to how it may be.